Sometimes I think or don’t think, maybe I just can’t think. I’m going through the motions of what I need to do, don’t wanna do, probably can’t do. It still gets me, or I don’t get it, still can’t get ahold of my new reality. I just don’t feel it somedays, like I’m looking out of a stained glass window, but the colors all seem gray. “I can’t give up!” I say to myself. Deep down inside I feel like it all seems meaningless. A season of mourning through the cloudy days, brings shadows of changes that I don’t want to admit, I don’t want to accept. Yet then I see it, a ray of sunlight breaks through that iridescent glass & I feel the warmth on a cold winter day. Then right before my weary eyes, a red tailed, golden speckled hawk, spreads its magnificent wings. It tilts to wave a grand stand greeting! I gasp for breath as I’m moved by such a display of incredible beauty. In an instant…for just a precious moment, my strength is renewed. My hope is restored & I accept this sign as a gift from God. I can’t change the outcome of what has been, but I can change my perspective of what will be. I want to see the everyday blessings before me, because these will bring hope & purpose through these disconnected days. A beautiful sunrise that wakes my morning day, as I watch the simple pleasures of life unfold through nature, music, a smile from a stranger, or a kiss from a loved one. This I know! I can… more than that, I need to abide, under the shadow of His wings. This is where I will find shelter & rest through these restless troubled times.
As difficult as this has been, is and will continue to be, there is a sense of comfort reading your words. The knowledge that what I am experiencing is normal, I am not alone, and the sun will shine again.
Thank you so much for every one of your posts💜💜
Charlene, thank you so much for your reply. I’m so glad that you can find some comfort in reading Out of the Ashes. I know this is difficult, but remember you are stronger than you feel!! 🙏👍💙
Thank you 💜